I got a phone call yesterday.
"Mrs. Murphy, this is Chuck. I'm the foreman on your new home. I was just calling to tell you that your lot has been released for construction, so in the next two weeks we'll lay it out and get started!"
What Chuck heard: "Gulp"
What he might have heard if my inner monologue had a voice: "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH"
See, we signed the paperwork for our new home 11 months ago. ELEVEN. So it's just been this kind of cool thing that's someday going to happen. Now all of a sudden they are GOING to BUILD our NEW HOUSE. And I sort of can't breathe.
The giant list of things to do to put the old house on the market is looming. The piece of $%#@ market is looming. DECORATING THE NEW HOUSE is looming.
"Twice the space? How am I going to decorate twice the space? What on earth are we going to do with all that space? AAHHHH! Why did we do this? Why did we buy a nicer house. Oh yeah our current house is old and small and the power bill is a shotty $198 a month on average because it bleeds air. Now I remember. New house good. Old house bad. But not that bad! Someone wants to buy it, right? I mean it's cute! I've poured my soul and sweat into that thing! It's a beautiful, old, air bleeding house! With a big, dead yard. But it's starting to come back to life! There's roses! People like roses! And paaaalm treeees! We've got your paaalm treeees! And wait a minute, new house won't be done until MAYBE the middle of September? And you can PRETTY much guarantee a month after that? Which in reality means I might not be able to cook Thanksgiving dinner in my new glorious kitchen? WHAT?!?!?!?"
Breathe, Kate, breathe.
I need to take Lamaze classes to get through this next six months. Yikes.
Ta-Daa! Sticky!
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3 comments:
Yes. Breathe, Kate, breathe. I'm sure that this is a happy thing, right?!
Lamaze, hmmm. It's okay. But I'd actually recommend Bradley Method for you. Or HYPNOBIRTHING!
(And yeah, I know these things...)
Now someone's going to think you're really pregnant.
REST ASSURED, KATEASTROPHE READERS!!! If she were pregnant, she would not be able to type the word BREATHE, I guarantee it.
(By the way, I have full confidence that you are going to sell your house for plenty of money and decorate your new one fantastically. You ALWAYS manage to make things work, you know?)
Yay Kate!! Not to worry, you'll decorate your house rad, I know it. Lets go to Ikea together!!
Congratulations! It must be scary, but how exciting!!!! Lets see some pictures of your air bleeding house!
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